4-Month-Old: Week 4

Hearing your baby laugh is not only a joy — it's a sign he's developing emotionally and socially. Have fun triggering a giggle by gently tickling his toes or chubby thighs. Or develop a pint-size comedy routine by making exaggerated facial expressions and funny animal sounds, snorts, and whistles. Don't be surprised if your baby tries to join in with an ecstatic squeal designed to catch your attention and make you laugh back.

How your baby's growing

Following a well-established nighttime routine, which might include a bath or a bedtime story, for example, may help settle your baby to sleep. It's a good idea to consistently "sequence" your baby toward slumber: Feed her, give her a bath, put her in her pajamas, play a game, read her a book, sing songs or play some music, then put her down.

A beloved routine gives you and your baby plenty of time to connect and wind down. You may decide to alternate going-to-bed activities with your partner (you do the bath, he reads the story, and so on). Or, to give both of you a regular break, try taking turns, with one person responsible for putting your baby to bed each night.

• Learn more fascinating facts about your 4-month-old's development.

Your life: Taking care of you

After the intensity of adjusting to life with a new baby, many parents reach a point where they find they're like ostriches lifting their heads out of the sand to discover a wider world out there — the one they took leave of, temporarily, after the birth. The redundancy and endlessness of baby care can also be very different from the pace at work if you're used to a goal-oriented job or lots of adult interaction.

Six ways to restore a little balance:
1. Join a parenting group. Look for a group that fosters your interests and offers lots of support through activities and resources. Check the listings in your local paper or at your library, place of worship, or pediatrician's office for meeting announcements. There are groups for breastfeeding moms, moms of color, working moms, book-reading moms, stay at home parents, and so on — or you might find an ad hoc neighborhood group.
2. Go online. Keep in touch with friends or family by e-mail, network with other parents at sites like BabyCenter, or just check in on "the outside world" at news sites.
3. Spend some time by yourself. Make sure you get a real break — a chance to relax, focus on yourself, and get inspired — at least once a week. Ideally, find a half hour just for you each day, maybe at nap time.
4. Read. Keep a book or magazine handy for those times when your baby naps. Even if it's just reading a few pages a day, you can "escape" to a world of fiction or learn something new.
5. Start a blog or a diary. Whether you choose to make your observations public or keep them private is up to you — simply recording them is a way to preserve your sanity.
6. Have an adult conversation. Whether it be over the phone or in person, chatting with a friend, relative, or your partner can re-energize you, especially if you steer clear of baby-related topics.

3 questions about: Shaken Baby Syndrome

What is shaken baby syndrome?S
haken baby syndrome (SBS) occurs when someone shakes a baby severely, causing the baby's brain to move inside his skull. Babies are especially vulnerable to injury because their neck muscles aren't strong enough to support their heads. This abuse can cause serious injuries, including blindness, eye damage, developmental delays, seizures, paralysis, and brain damage. It can even be fatal.

Can it be caused by roughhousing?
In theory that's possible, but it would have to be pretty rough play. The ordinary kind of jiggling, patting, and tickling that a loving parent does when interacting with a baby doesn't cause shaken baby syndrome. Nor do swings, vibrating bouncy seats, or driving over rough roads. The kind of abuse that leads to SBS is deliberate and severe. It's usually caused by someone who loses their control when caring for a baby.

What should I do if I know or think my baby has been shaken?
A shaken baby may appear colicky, may vomit or appear to have a feeding problem, or may be irritable and fussy. If you suspect SBS and any of these signs are present, call your baby's doctor or take your baby to the emergency room immediately. Be clear and honest so that the most accurate diagnosis can be made and the best treatment given. Baby care can be taxing and frustrating. Every caregiver should learn healthy, safe ways to deal with exasperation and anger, including deep breathing, taking time-outs, or seeking support from friends, family, or your baby's doctor.